Tag Archives: positivity

Create your future – 3 areas of your life to use selection and get what you want

Personal Development, , , , , ,

The power of selection in your life

Are you the type of person that tends to go with the flow? How about your friends. Are they the result of a period of lonely desperation?

Take a break, step back, and ask yourself the following question.

Is your life in “fate’s” hands, or are you the captain of your ship?

Honestly.

How much of what has happened in your life is the result of your desire to have it happen? Are the people in your life providing a positive contribution to your growth? Do your actions align with who you are, and more importantly, who you want to be?

I can say with certainty that I was floating along for many years, not attracting positive outcomes that aligned with my spirit and inner being. It seemed no matter how hard I tried to make things work (relationships, goals, outcomes, dreams etc.), they never seemed to ‘stick’.

Now, as I am sooo much older (joke) and wiser, I can see what was missing all along.

I was missing the importance of selection.

Used positively, selection will give you the ability to reach new heights, and master your destiny.

This post is going to talk about the practice of selection – what it is to me, how I have used it, and the three areas which I see it can improve the outcome of your goals, dreams, desires, and help you find relationships you’ve dreamed of.

What is selection

Although this blog post will cover my spiritual and emotional views on selection, I find many similarities in the scientific definitions.

Take a look below. I’ve highlighted some interesting points.

In the context of evolution, selection refers to individuals with advantages or“adaptive” traits, who tend to be more successful than their peers reproductively—meaning they contribute more offspring to the succeeding generation than others do.

~Wikipedia

Natural selection is the gradual process by which biological traits become either more or less common in a population as a function of the effect of inherited traits on the differential reproductive success of organisms interacting with their environment. It is a key mechanism of evolution.

~Wikipedia

The definition of selection

Using these evolutionary-based definitions, I present to you my definition of selection as:

Selection – a process applied by individuals in which desired traits are inherited by deliberate exposure to a chosen population and/or environment. 

Selection is everywhere.

At a subconscious level, it drives us to pick certain people as partners, to desire certain objects, to behave certain ways.

Good news is, it can be controlled.

Selection can be a choice you make.

Not only is selection programmed into our being as evolution, I believe there are strong advantages that can be gained through adaptation of this concept into your thought process, and your action.

Yes, you can choose selection in your life.

Selection is a framework for you to act on your preferred choices.

Sure, it acts at a subconscious level constantly without us even knowing; but what if you could increase your awareness to the process? How could you use the process of selection to create positive outcomes in your life?

The first step is a commitment to action – to act upon your desire to change.

This is key.

No matter how much you dream, visualise, think about something, nothing eventuates without some form of action from you.

The next step is to choose which areas to act upon.

3 areas of your life that the use of selection will improve

It sounds selfish, but I’ve been gradually increasing my practice of selection since Anthony Robbins brought it to my attention through his audio programs in 2012.

That’s because selection requires you to choose and act upon options that are best for you. 

So where can you apply selection and why would you bother?

Here are 3 areas of my life which have seen profound improvement by using the selection process.

1. Relationships

This is the single most important area for me, and chances are it is for you too.

Why? Consider the following quote:

You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.

~Jim Rohn

I’m a social person – more of an extrovert than an introvert. Human interaction is one of my primary means of learning, and a topic of personal interest. This means that I find myself easily influenced by the people I choose as company.

The company I choose has a direct influence on the habits, skills, and mental health I learn and adopt.

I’ve met and bonded with some great people in my time, and I’m grateful to have them as friends today. On the other side of the spectrum, there are some people that who I’ve had limited choice over due to my environment at the time (see the next key area below).

I’m sure you will agree when I say that not all relationships are equal. It’s true that all people can provide you with value – be it company or knowledge –  so long as the value aligns with your chosen goals, values, morals etc.

You have the ability to select those people you feel are contributing positively to your growth. Why not use it?

If someone doesn’t align with your aims, it isn’t right to outright ignore, discount, or in any way direct offence toward them. After all, how are they to know? Your choices are not their choices. Consider their offerings, and decline graciously if you decide they aren’t a good fit for you.

Be kind, respectful, and compassionate with your dealings. After all, it isn’t hard to practice the simple act of courtesy to those we meet.

Besides, the world could never run short of kindness and compassion.

2. Environment

This is the most obvious area of life that influences our future.

Choosing a place to live, getting that ideal job in the city, a holiday on the ocean listening to the waves…….

Our environment can play a huge part on how we feel, and thus how we are able to learn, grow, and interact.

Ever been put in an environment that made you feel anxious, overwhelmed, trapped etc.? Not an ideal space to harbour learning or personal growth, and an ideal place for negativity to flourish.

In some cases, your work, hobbies, or even where you live, all lead to an environment that can be toxic to your future. It will be unique for each person of course. There are no one-cause-fits-all answers, nor do there need to be. Based on this post, you already know the answer right….

Selection.

OK, so it may be difficult to have your cake and eat it too, so I’ll be more specific.

Select an environment that aligns with your goals, values, morals etc. that you can spend the majority of your time amongst.

Like the environment? Live near a park.

Love being outdoors? Have lunch outside.

Want to save the Koalas? Don’t work for a mining company (this is a personal one for me!).

Choose what environments nurture your positive growth and select them, committing to action.

3. Sources of Information

Today’s world revolves around information. You’re absorbing more right now. Television, radio, newspapers, magazines, internet, social media….. The list of influential information is extensive, and getting longer.

When was the last time you applied a filter to the information you’re exposed to?

Do you watch the evening news? The morning news? Read a newspaper?

Have a think about how often you remember seeing something positive. Something with substance. Something that actually had relevance to your life and your future.

Chances are, you won’t remember many.

Surprising isn’t it, considering how much time people spend exposing themselves to the overload of information out there.

Selection, selection, selection.

Timothy Ferriss talks about the concept of a ‘low information diet’ in his book, the Four Hour Workweek, to get you to see what it’s like to remove yourself from information overload. Essentially, you go without viewing/reading/listening to any form of informative or educational material for a week, and see if your life is really worse of for it.

After performing this selective information intake continuously for about 2 years now ( i don’t watch or read world news, and if I want to know then I ask someone instead), I can guarantee your life won’t stop. In fact, quite the opposite.

With less unnecessary information, there is space for meaningful information.

Rather than just listen to any old audio for something to do, or slouch on the couch in front of the news because that’s the ‘done thing’, select what information works for you and provides you real value to enrich the quality of your life.

Watch an inspiring documentary, read that novel, start that long delayed project.

Practice selective information intake, and you’ll find many more hours in your day to put towards things that matter to you. Feel the need to find out what’s happening in the world? Ask someone else. They’ve spent the time absorbing it all so you don’t. Use them!

Less time spent on unnecessary information, means you’ll have more time to do what you want.

And you can start right now!

I’m going to challenge you to make the process of selection a concious consideration in your life. No longer is it an evolutionary term which you let happen. It can be controlled.

Select your relationships, environment, and the information you expose yourself to wisely.

Use my definition to empower yourself, and carve your destiny so that you get what you want in life.

You have a choice, and no matter how hard it seems, you have the ability to take action.

Selection is the actioning of your choice.

Get out there and start creating your future!

Are there any areas of your life other than those mentioned above that you feel contribute to the quality of your life, and the creation of your future? I’d love to hear about it! Tell me more in the comments below.

I appreciate you taking time to read my work. If you like it, please share it with your friends on social media using the links.

The more people I can inspire, the happier I’ll be.

Yours in inspiration,

Jason

Have faith, believe in yourself, and follow your heart – 3 ways to deal with change

Personal Development, , , , , ,

You’ve got an idea.

A dream, a passion, a goal; a desire to be something else.

Progress is being made, but there are some days where you find yourself chasing other, juicier carrots.

It’s you, the donkey, that must decide whether the carrot in your face or the carrot awaiting you during the course of your journey, is worthy of the crunch. Despite your hunger, you already know the answer……..

Is this you?

Are you getting distracted by the abundance of opportunity?

I am.

Or should I say, I was.

I’d like to share a musing today on change – the ups, the downs, the internal struggles, and the gratification once your mind becomes comfortable with the concept.

It can be difficult. You can ask anyone out there and you’ll no doubt get the same response.

Change is hard.

Those who come out on top will also tell you that change can be one of the most difficult obstacles that you face in life. That’s not all though.

Change is hard, and the rewards make it all worthwhile.

This post will introduce you to the concept of change. How it manifests, how you could (and could not) react, and how the simple act of faith and self belief can give energy to push forward against it’s seeming adversity. You can use the three simple coping methods to work towards your exciting changes knowing that if you feel disheartened, lost or misguided, you aren’t alone.

Have faith, believe in yourself, and follow your heart.

The process of change

Recognise – What’s that in the wind?

Change, that’s what.

Change is inevitable.

Change is always coming.

Whether you look forward to a change or dread it, change triggers powerful effects in your body and your emotions. For most people (myself included), we get comfortable in how things are and the ways we do things. Routine is predictable, reliable comfortable. Change goes against this.

Quite often, change = stress.

Fortunately, with the right thinking, you can increase your sense of control and steer your life into positive territory when you know how to deal with change.

Knee-jerk reaction – Undesirable ways you could combat change 

Change is on it’s way, and you know it.

Time to freak out!

Why is it happening? What can you do to stop it? What does it all mean? How are you going to work this into your life? What will so-and-so think?

The self talk can be overwhelming.

What’s the first thing to do once you realise change is coming?

Take action.

How?

  • The coping method – The act of simply giving in to change, letting it control you, and living as best you can, albeit powerless. As long as you are coping, just getting by, your have limited choices. Change is at the wheel. You are not in control. As such you could feel trapped, cocooned and isolated, and you could miss out on other opportunities as you spend energy just keeping up with the change.
  • Fight the change – Armed with ample amounts of anger and frustration, you could face change front-on in a full counter-attack! If you’ve ever tried this ‘path of maximum resistance’ you’ll know that this tactic can easily sap your strength. Since the fight is normally undertaken alone, you can also find yourself battling feelings of loneliness alongside the daunting pressure of the fight. Not nice.

Hold on, is this really the best thing to do?

I have learnt through experience that the answer is clearly no.

Fighting against change only creates further stress in life. After all, adding fuel to the fire never put it out, so it’s best not to spend excess energy on something that may be largely out of your control.

When it comes to considering acting against change, I find it’s best to do a self assessment of the situation and ask:Is the effort worth the reward?

Your answer will give guidance as to the path worth taking.

Diminishing hope – The ferocity of self doubt

Sometimes the true and desirable path doesn’t become known quickly.

It’s one thing to cope, and another to fight, but what about when you are struck with ‘paralysis through analysis’?

The longer you dwell on change, the more you doubt your ability to deal with it.

Your resistance to negativity falls, your courage takes a beating, and your hope faith falters.

Self doubt sets in.

This, in my experience, is most damaging to your progress. It is very easy to convince yourself that you are simply not good enough, not strong enough, not capable, to make change work for you.

And self doubt get’s worse over time.

To stop your self doubt manifesting itself into a force to be reckoned with, consider the following:

  • Treat change as a process – Dealing with change is not like an electric switch that is either on or off. There are many steps and components involved. It will take time.
  • Reframe the way you think about change – Choose to give positive meaning to change. Even if you’ve never tried it, you CAN thrive on change.
Breathe – Take time. Create space. Recharge your mental capacity and give yourself a break. Prepare to move with the changes, because they are going to happen. Don’t deny yourself the liberation that awaits.

3 ways I deal with change, and how you can too

Change needn’t be daunting. It needn’t be scary, and it doesn’t have to be hard.

When dealt with positively, change is what leads you onwards on your journey.

Change + positivity = opportunity.

Now that I’ve set you up with a relaxed, positive mindset, how can you now go about dealing with change?

1. Set smart goals

Goals are so important in determining a direction for your change. Don’t get caught up in the ‘big question’ goals though (like “what do I want to do with my life”), as these are poorly defined and are not useful in your quest.

Set smart goals.

Use incremental steps so you can consciously and effortlessly guide the change. Use the concept of ‘chunking’ – break things into manageable steps. If your goal is to run 10km, start by completing smaller 3km efforts. Do 3 of these, and you have suddenly reached the 10km goal!

Write out your goals and your plans to meet them. Remember, these are ideas that are totally changeable. Goals are as fluid as you are, so don’t stress about commitment if it bothers you.

Just start, and let momentum build.

2. Adopt and attitude of positivity, anticipation, and gratitude

Welcome change as an opportunity, not something to fuel negativity.

Negative thoughts block your creativity and problem-solving abilities. Positive thoughts build bridges to possibilities and opportunities.

Find the benefit in the change.

There is always a benefit and opportunity to be found, if you look in the right places.

Practice mindfulness, adopt awareness, be grateful.

These are useful tools that will help you develop a deeper understanding of what you really want to achieve

3. Communicate with supportive people

Talking with people helps, a lot.

Sometimes it’s simply too much to do alone. Finding a support network to assist you with your task can help you deal with the stress of change.

Be selective with your audience. 

In your time of transition and hardship, It’s easy to be persuaded by anothers’ point of view. Make sure that the company you turn to has your interests at heart, and who understands the true meaning of the change you face.

Having someone give false support based on a lacking knowledge of your situation will only add confusion.

You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with.

Choose your company wisely.

Make sure they’re the type that encourage positive growth for you.

Change. It’s a sometimes difficult necessity to personal growth.

The good news is, change is only as difficult as you make it.

I hope my three ways to deal with change, smart goals, attitude, and support, provide you with some useful guidance to combat any current and future change in your life.

As I go through my upcoming changes, I will certainly reflect on this post. I hope you do too. Good luck with your endeavours, I know you will do well.

Remember, nothing is as bad, hard, painful, scary as it seems.

Have faith, believe in yourself, and follow your heart.

I appreciate you taking time to read my work. If you like it, please share it with your friends on social media using the buttons below.

The more people I can help, the happier I’ll be.

Yours in inspiration,

Jason

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Letting go of routine – Take a break from life and re energise

Personal Development, , , , , , , ,

Another long weekend has just passed in Australia, and it was a great time for me to unwind and take stock. I decided to explore the great outdoors with some wonderful friends, on an adventure to Porcupine Gorge.

As I drove home after the 3 days away, I realised that the most valuable experience I got was not actually the travel experience as I thought.

I got value out of a break from routine.

Have you ever felt in a rut? Like nothing you do excites you? Do you find yourself dreading home life.

I regularly do.

To re energise and overcome these feelings, I find it valuable to break my routine.

In this post I would like to touch on routine, and how valuable it is for me to experience a break. With this new awareness, you can go ahead and plan a routine retreat for yourself, and experience the benefits.

What is routine?

Routine, a task that you undertake regularly, is present in my life in the following ways.

  • Work – The continual act of addressing my professional occupation. In general, the population works from 9-5, 5 days out of 7. There is minimal time for ourselves, so it is natural for us to make stringent routines so that we may get the most out of our valuable time.
  • Living – Life outside can get overwhelming, so we tend to manufacture a safe, predictable, comfortable environment to shelter us. Quite often, this space rarely changes.
  • Hobbies – I’m busy outside my 9-5, and I’m sure you are too. Whether you be a forward on the football team, secretary of a garden club, or a champion on the WOW scene. We often fall to comfortable past times that make us feel good and act to positively reinforce our current abilities. As time passes, we may in fact be reinforcing bad habits.
  • Surroundings – As a general rule, we work, live, and play in the same space. Work in a city? Chances are you live there too. This limits the variety we can experience, and is in fact another form of routine

Let go of routine, just for a bit

Yes, it’s hard to let go and unwind. Sometimes it’s scary too.

Challenge yourself to try something different.

I decided to go camping and get out in nature. Doing this shakes up everything in my life – a new surrounding, living with people, preparing food without a kitchen, no shower or toilet facilities, being self sufficient.

At the end of the experience, I realised I had let go of so much emotional baggage, I had forgotten most of the week (the good and the not so good). It was refreshing to the mind.

I found that letting go of routine allowed me to release my emotional stress.

This, with a busy lifestyle, is a truly valuable and enjoyable experience.

I appreciate you taking time to read my work. If you like it, please share it with your friends on social media using the buttons below.

The more people I can help, the happier I’ll be.

Yours in inspiration,

Jason

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3 reasons it’s good to celebrate little wins and focus on what matters

Personal Development, , , , ,

It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.

– Buddah

Welcome back to my dedicated readers, and a big Aussie G’day to those newcomers that have landed here through Facebook and Twitter.

How has your week been?

It’s been a huge week for me. So much has happened it puts my head into a spin.

I’ve made real progress in selling my property (which I touched on in my post about regret), I made big progress toward my new project (more info soon), and I may have landed a casual job in a coffee shop.

Things are in my favour. Life looks great, right?

Looks can be deceiving.

It’s strange how the human mind works. So many things that I have been dreaming of happening I find are coming to action, and I’m not happy, I’m not elated, I’m not celebrating.

I’m focusing on the struggles ahead, the work still to be done, the long, windy road.

I’m focusing on the challenges in a negative way.

It affected me so much, I just had to share it with you.

This post is a fix of positivity for your day. I want to highlight how the weeks’ important life developments have caused me to be overcome with negativity, my top reasons that celebrating little wins in times like this is so valuable, and how the process has allowed me to end the week on an awesome high! Hopefully there are some great tips you can take on board for your benefit.

Let’s get stuck into some good vibrations, shall we?

Big changes, and how focus on my challenges disrupted my week

Big changes for me are afoot.

In life there comes a time when the powers that be just seem to throw nothing but curve-balls at you, and then there are times when it’s a streak of home runs on your behalf!

That’s the thing. Life is full of personal wins (positive experiences), and frustrating challenges (negative).

I’m sure you can relate.

This week I had a number of life changing events that occurred for me. The thing is, I upon learning of the news, I quickly found ways to turn these ‘little wins’ into ‘oh no, more effort’ thoughts very quickly.

The negative mindset I created was anything but productive.

Here’s the main emotions I experienced.

  • I felt overwhelmed – Action, action, action! After so long pushing for and awaiting an outcome, all I could recognise at the time I received good news was that there was so much more work to do! Momentum was gaining, and it was now time to initiate the next phase. This meant work, and time.
  • I was depressed – So, times are a changing, mostly for the better, but what about all the hardship and sacrifice to get to this point? I found myself surrounded by the disruptive feelings of regret – regret for the choices I made, the actions I took, the people I’d hurt. It was depressing.
  • There was anxiety too – I rode through the feelings of overwhelmed, only to be faced with anxiety. Mental to do lists, fear of the unknown, pressure to perform, expectations to use my golden opportunity to charge forward to my dreams. So much expectation to perform, it fuelled toxic anxious feelings, disrupting my sleep and mental clarity. 

This is just part of my experience with the challenges I faced. These were a very powerful driver of my emotional state, until my girlfriend stopped my in my tracks, and pointed out that life wasn’t bad, I had achieved a lot, and that I was making incremental progress towards my dreams.

She was right, and It got me thinking differently.

It got me thinking of celebration!

Celebrating wins – 3 reasons it’s good to party

1.  Increase your sense of control over what’s important in your life

So, you just kicked a goal.

Great!

Celebrate these incremental steps that you have overcome. It highlights that for all your effort, planning, and persistence, you are the master of your domain.

You are in control of your destiny.

So you left the toilet seat up and you got spanked? Does it really matter? Probably not.

Focus on what matters in your life, and how you are dominating that area. When you focus on what you are achieving, no matter how small, you gain a sense of control and authority which is extremely empowering.

2.  It gives you positive motivation to push forward

You’re running a marathon and you’ve passed the 21km mark (half way). It’s a huge mental challenge, and you find yourself overwhelmed with thoughts of the craziness that your enthusiasm 5 months ago has led to!

Do you decide to a) focus on what’s still to go; or b) celebrate the pavement you’ve just dominated?

Hint: the right answer is b)!

You’ve just completed a half marathon, something most people in the world would never dream of doing! And, you’re still going! Might as well finish the job!

Celebrate the small achievements along the road to you dreams.

There’s lots of distance to cover, and it will seem worthwhile and motivating if you take time to put achievements into perspective.

3.  Reinforce your self worth and nurture your ego

When did thinking negatively and focusing on challenges ahead make you feel like you were a better, stronger, smarter person?

Chances are, never.

It’s important to recognise the good times during your journey and add them to your arsenal of awesomeness.

You can do great, you can achieve. Your only limit, is to what you believe.

This doesn’t mean you need to go overboard and let the whole world know (although, do that if it works for you!). Celebrate your efforts, your result, your achievement.

Celebrate for you.

Doing this will build a better self image to those around you, and will reinforce positive thoughts and behaviours.

TIP: Affirmations can be a great way to actively reinforce your small wins.

 

There’s a party at the end of my week, and I’m invited!

How did I transform my overwhelming, daunting start to the week?

I found my focus by looking at what matters most.

If you find yourself in a similar situation in life – faced with daunting life changes that only seem to create more negative challenges – remember the following 3 reasons to celebrate:

  1. Increase your awareness to the control you have over your thoughts
  2. Recognise wins that led you, and will provide motivation going forward; and
  3. Practice positive reinforcement of these wins to help be a more positive force!

I’m sure you’ll undergo a transformation that will prove a force to be reckoned with.

I know I did 🙂

I appreciate you taking time to read my work. If you like it, please share it with your friends on social media using the buttons below.

The more people I can help, the happier I’ll be.

Here’s to being your best self!

Jason

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